Tulo Mattress Review
(One Month Later)
So 2 fortnights later (is that a castlenight?) and with a fat little winged kid cosplaying a magical Katniss upon us, how does the Tulo mattress fair? I’m pleased to report that I’m a happy… not a camper? Maybe an indoor, sleep on a bedder? Let’s go with that and move along shall we.
Point is, I have no complaints thus far. I can’t comment on longevity at this point of course, but my experience thus far is nothing but Tulific. The mattress itself seemingly has a little more “give” where I sleep, and it is firm without placing pressure on any one point. That is key, because my Planet Coaster suited complaint with my old mattress was the pain in my back and shoulders oft experienced in the morning.
After only a dull ache the first couple of nights on the Tulo mattress (my body slowly recovering from the torture I was inflicting on it) I have noticed no discomfort or pain, and I am sleeping better than Mario after force feeding Wart a salad. On the occasions where I have awoken at night, I am able to quickly rejoin my heavenly slumber of Kripsy Kreme foliage lining roads paved with Kit Kat bricks (don’t judge me, it’s my dream, and I’ll be as fat as I want too).
That said, while the softest mattress was the right choice for me—ymmv. Along with the obnoxious, bone chilling cold that comes with a low body fat, I also don’t need much support from my mattress. Take my opinion with a Death Star trash compactor full of salt. If you are normal person who does 0o’t track their macros with the same obsession that Mr. Krabbs’ reviews his 401K, you may have a different experience with how sink-in-toage.
While I don’t have much to draw from for comparisons sake, I’m pleased with my purchase— especially considering the low price point. I can’t compare it to other memory foam products, but the Tulo is doing the trick for me without a hefty price tag. Now if you’ll excuse me, those Original Glazed daisies won’t eat themselves.
When I envisioned this site, I did not expect to ever write a Tulo mattress review (for which I was not paid or compensated in any way). But in the end, I’m really just here to make very punny (wink, wink) jokes.
Stupid first is my motto! Wait…
Soooo, back to the topic at teeth (or would it be chain? Candivorous Rex doesn’t have hands after all), there is not a lot of information on the relatively new Tulo mattress, but what is available is intriguing — An affordable bed in a box with firmness options that one can physically try in stores.
I hesitated to grab a bed in the box in the past despite the appealing alliteration because I couldn’t put one through its paces before committing. Despite being reluctant to set Kuribo’s Shoe in a mattress store, the little Sith and I made some extra time before her third viewing of The Last Jedi to check it out.
So, I was off to Mattress Firm to see if I liked it when counting make believe Mario’s– or maybe just those adorable sombrero sporting sheep in Odyssey. The salesman who was also the manager did his best Peanut’s adult impersonation with his spiel, but overall, he was helpful and not annoying. I considered grabbing the bed from the store, but it was not in stock and they wanted to charge for delivery. Combined with a coupon code for a free frame from Tulo which Mattress Firm did not offer– online ordering was the way to go. A comfy cloud loving lakitu at heart, I warp whistled my way to a soft full-size mattress that I received yesterday.
The free Tulo Mattress Base that I was promised was back ordered, but they made good with a frame and box spring so it was all marvelous in the Mushroom Kingdom. Communication with regards to delivery was excellent and they kept me abreast of updates along with a two-hour window for delivery– including notification it would arrive a little ahead of schedule.
Often the general public likes to feign ignorance at how awestruck they are by my mere presence, but that has apparently changed my friends. Everyone reading this already knows of course, but…
You see, the delivery people literally rolled out a red carpet for me at my own home. The world is finally ready for me to claim the Plastic Throne. The seat of power for my benevolent dictatorship, forged from molten light gun zappers that slew a thousand digital ducks and N64 analog sticks that flayed flesh and blood palms (seriously, the palm of my hand still looks like I need a skin graft twenty years later– thanks Mario Party!).
Either that, or the whole carpet thing is a marketing gimmick to get people to Twit about it on Instabook, but I’m going to apply Occam’s razor and go with the former.
A simple matter of removing it from the box, cutting a bit of plastic and unrolling, setup was quicker than the Kessel Run, taking about 10 minutes. The Tulo mattress immediately began to inflate, and I was pleased no off gassing that would put Wario’s odiferousness to shame was present– even for my wife’s Super Sniffer.
There were no directions for how long to wait before using the mattress, but I left it alone for about 7 hours before bed. I was prompted to look into a mattress in the first place due to back and shoulder pain in the mornings along with general unrest at night, all of which had been occurring more and more frequently. It may take some time for the foam to form to my fit form, but anecdotally, I feel like I slept better despite waking a few times. The Tulo isn’t expected to be a cure all for my sleep issues, but my first night was better than what came before at least.
As Tulo indicates a break-in period may be necessary, I have 120 days to have them collect the mattress and receive a full refund. I intend to update this post as time goes by to share what I think, so if you are in the market or just want to see some more of my special brand of stupid, stay tuned.
Oh, and regardless of what I think in the end, the best Mario character ever seems to enjoy the new mattress…