Is That a Yoshi Egg in Your Question Block Cake, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

Question Block Cake
Images courtesy of the amazing wildlifebycyrene

The Mushroom Kingdom is a magical place… minus the constant peril of kidnapping, being swallowed whole by ravenous dinosaurs, or literally being chased and vaporized by the sun— Idyllic.


That is until we threw a grad party for my sister as a showcase for the spinoff I’m pitching to the Food Network—Yan Sure as Fuck Can’t Cook. All this is to say, I know I suck. Case in my point, this Question Block cake.

Question Block Cake
A question block navel gazing is a whole new level of inception

My creations taste good, usually, but look at that thing! I’ve seen better looking orange chicken after a month in back-of-fridge purgatory. (As if orange chicken survives for longer than 5 minutes when I’m around; that shit is Ketracel-white deep-fried in Kasa oil.)


I share though because when I go looking for tasty or clever ideas, I have to wade through such captivating tales as little Billy’s potty training oopsy or William Shakespaw’s spa day at Shampoodles. Wouldn’t you rather see the result of a Food Network Challenge meets Darwin Award chock full of awful puns and dated pop culture references than read about toilet paper cozies?


I do this so for you, dear reader, so you can feel good about your product no matter how disastrous the finished good. Yeah, I do it on purpose, let’s go with that…


On to the menu:


  • Hot Yoshicoa: White chocolate melted and mixed into half and half with mint extract
  • Question Block Cake: A boxed yellow cake and tub frosting we adapted from Nerdy Nummies
  • Yoshi Egg Brownie Pop: A giant Oreo truffle-esque cream cheese brownie coated in almond bark and made to look like a Yoshi egg… if you are legally blind.


The party started with a round of Mario Kart: Shaun White edition… if you swap the karts for dollar store sleds clipped with hand decorated Super Mario character cards and Shaun White for a bunch of idiots incapable of staying on said sleds for more than a few seconds. So, basically, nothing at all like either of those things.

Question Block Cake
All art courtesy of my sister who painted them all by hand as a gift.

Question Block Cake Wario

Stage appropriately set, let’s talk cake. Now, you have to use your imagination a bit as I have the artistic ability and attention to detail of a kindergartener after five bowls of Chocolate-Frosted Sugar Bombs bathed in Four Loko. But that’s all part of the hand crafted rustic charm! At least, that’s what I tell myself so I can continue being able to look in the mirror long enough to shave without having to shower cry afterward.

Question Block Cake

Despite the photographic evidence to the contrary, the focus was on the decoration and not the flavor. As this was for my sister who’s taste for lemon is inversely proportional to her love for Yoshi, we cheated with a boxed Betty Crocker Yellow Cake and yellow tub frosting and a pack of white fondant. Six 6×6 pans from 2 boxes and 2 tubs of frosting later, we had our base to work from. We free handed the cutting with a knife as is abundantly clear by the Block of Deleano Pilaza (wow that was awful, I’m leaving it). Anyone who has been appropriately horrified by my pumpkin carving would have predicted this result.


Coring and frosting the cakes was actually pretty simple despite my proclivity for screwing things up, and it did not take more than 15 minutes to assemble the cake. We cut question marks and blocks from fondant with the aid of a  printed 8×11 stencil, if you don’t treat your hand like an angry thwomp to Mario’s fondant face by pressing down as hard as you can, the paper won’t stick.


As for the coins in the original recipe, a Wario cake this is not. When a lady loves dinosaurs and brownies, you give her a fucking pan of brownies injected with gobs of cream cheese all encased in white candy coating and bits of green candy melts for the finishing touch. You will not have a lot of room to work with if you decide to go with my Yoshi Egg surprise, so if you don’t plan ahead by dropping your food on the floor like me, you probably only need about half the pan. The rest should be promptly shoveled into your face like you’re auditioning for the lead role in a Fat Princess sequel. Brownie me please!

Question Block Cake Yoshi Egg Brownie

Protip: Save time cutting the bottom off of your brownies by not dropping them onto the floor!


Like A Bowser Protip: But if you do, you will quickly discover why dogs are man’s best friend because they will love you forever.


A word of warning, if I had to do it over again, I would not add the green candy melt chocolate after the bark hardened. As a couple of the dots fell off, I would add the green melts as I applied the bark coating. After the egg was finished, I propped it up and pooled bark at the base to create a stand. This proved to be the one intelligent thing I did in this process as it made standing the egg inside of the cake much easier. Quick insertion (that’s what she said) and a bit of a dome from the egg that was just a litttttlllleeeee too big (that’s what he said) and Bobomb’s your uncle, it was done.

Question Block Cake

One should not expect to cut the brownie with the cake, we gingerly removed it and sliced them separately. None of this was pretty, but it was as tasty as Luigi is lame— phenomenally.


If you attempt anything similar let me know, I’d love to hear how you didn’t screw it up!

Question Block Cake Wario Sled

I leave you with a video of the events that occured on the rainbow road of snowy hills…


Cap’n Crunch Peanut Butter Milkshake

Flying Dutchman’s Frightful Delight

(Cap’n Crunch Peanut Butter Milkshake)

Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter Milkshake Finished

In honor of the best holiday of the year, behold the spooky spectacle of a homemade Halloween Cap’n Crunch milkshake. Unfortunately, the Cap’ns gimmicky ghoulish green glow is lost once blended with ice cream, sans ecotplasm, but you can still taste the difference (not really). That aside, you may have seen me rave about the Cinnamon Toast Crunch Milkshake from Buger King, but I am here to not so humbly state that this homemade diabetes delight eats it for…



how about, cleans its cinnamon clock?

Yeah, lets go with that.

Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter Milkshake Soak

To be fair, with Graeters doing the heavy lifting in my cereal shake, comparing the two is about as fair as pitting a rancor against a poodle. Flying Dutchman’s Frightful Delight captures the purest essence of a cereal milkshake and is easily customizable with other cereal celebrities beyond the good Cap’n.

Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter Milkshake Ingredients

Want to make your own?

Adapted from Cap’n Crunch Milkshakes



  • 1 Cup (202 g) Vanilla ice cream or other ice cream of choice (this quantity can be adjusted to achieve desired consistency) (I used Graeters Madagascar Vanilla Bean and it was phenomenal)


  • .75 Cups (180ml) milk of choice (more or less depending on the desired consistency, I used cashew milk)


  • 1.5 Cup (52g) Cap’n crunch cereal of choice with some reserved for garnish (or just use more, there’s no such thing as too much cereal in my world)


  • 1/4 Cup (64g) creamy peanut butter (also consider another tablespoon or 15 grams or so melted to drizzle on top)


  • Whipped cream for topping if desired



Pour the not so salty seaman’s delicious, and in this case spooky, booty into a container and send it to Davey Jone’s Locker (in other words, add milk). Soak for about an hour, giving the mixture a stir or shake a few times. I used my Ninja Blender and kept the same cup for the entire process.

Once you have a bowl of mush you wouldn’t actually eat, add it to your blender with ice cream and peanut butter. In theory, one could strain the milk and simply use that, discarding the soggy cereal. This is an offense that falls just shy of animal torture in my world, but you do you, I just don’t want to know about it.

Blend until smooth and add milk or ice cream until desired consistency is reached.

Pour into glasses and top with whipped cream, extra cereal (crushed or whole) and drizzle with melted peanut butter if you so desire.

Pledge your eternal soul to the Dutch’s crew for bringing you this deliciousness, and if you find his sock, don’t forgot to use your other two wishes wisely.